Saturday, July 18, 2009

Glorious sadness.......

This is one of my all time favorite songs - for many, many reasons. I believe there is 'truth' in these lyrics and 'truth' is the theme upon which this blog is designed - and upon which my life is built. "knowing My It's" or as the blog is titled "KNOW YOUR ITS"....






This song touches me deeply. You?


"...........................and this glorious sadness that brings you to your knees" Imagine the words glorious and sadness together. I understand those words combined all too well. As we surrender to some deeper truth, some consuming reality, some life changing event it is glorious in it's opportunity and sad in it's often harsh demands. But ah!! I rise, rise up to face it - tears streaming - arms stretched out to whomever is watching, scream to whomever is listening, and whisper "I believe" - some times I falter, and bang my clenched fists to the ground, curling up and away from light and truth and challenge - but to what end? My despair changes nothing -


and yet I declare my right to feel despair, and rage and question "why"? I have my tantrum - I don't apologize for it either. It is exhausting but I tantrum until it is over and not one moment before. With swollen eyes and red face I collapse - I look a fright! Agonizing does that to a person. I feel empty now - relieved even - I can rest now - quietly and be comforted by all that surrounds me. Funny how we don't really recognize or acknowledge that which comforts us until we need comforting. Comforts are often taken for granted. My pillow feels softer, my sheets cool and protecting. My long hair swirls my neck and face like a veil of shadows that disguise. The faces of my stuffed animals look up at me adoringly each one cuter than the next. The pictures on end tables and walls of family and precious memories speak to me with reminders of what is mine. The sparkling seltzer with little ice cubes and a fresh lemon slices soothes and cools my lips and mouth and throat. There are arms to hold me and eyes to gaze into - there are words of support and love spoken and unspoken. The sun filters through Windows and sky lights and the wind sets the chimes in harmony. The scents of flowers and wet grass and the sounds of birds sweet voices and bulky frogs bellowing fill my senses. And so it is, the truth is still the truth - regardless of it's nature - and the arms of the angels extend out from every where and in every form. I need only to relax and be embraced.

And so I will do just that.

Love and comfort
Gail
peace.....

14 comments:

Eileen said...

I felt like that many times in my life.

Thankfully the most devastating times of my life emptied me, and brought my closer to God, therefore, they were indeed times of glorious sadness.

Very heartfelt, very thought-provoking post and song.
All the best,
Eileen

PENolan said...

Every now and then, I surrender to that storm of tears. It really is like a summer thunder storm, a brief, furious outburst. Then it's over til the next time. Glorious sadness, indeed.

Wanda said...

Beautiful post Gail...I too love "In the Arms of an Angel"...I very easily see how you relate...songs can help with moods or bring them on...good or bad...going with those feelings is a beautiful release as the song says so well...
Besides music, my beautiful release is walking alone in the woods...seeing the early morning light filter down through the trees...and the total silence...then hearing the lone bird...maybe a Hawk, a Thrush, yesterday it was a Towhee...it just seems so meant for only ME in that moment...it centers me...makes me so aware of everything good...
Life does test us...my husband was treated for cancer 2 years ago...cannot change that fact, but it does not define who we are...
as your illness does not either...your awareness of what life has to offer is obvious to me.

I am thankful for having your blog to read...along with "The Scbribe" of course...Both give me "Beautiful Release"
Take care Gail,
Wanda

Gail said...

Hi Wanda-

SO nice to see you this bright Sunday morn. I find release walking through your woods and nature-land and I am only seeing pictures. I can only imagine how magical and healing it is to actually be present in the moments you described.

I appreciate your kind and understanding words so very much.

Love to you
Gail
peace......

Gail said...

Hi Trish-

I love your words -------"a summer thunder storm".......

I know you know.........all about glorious sadness.

I love ya girl.
Gail
peace......

Gail said...

Hi Eileen-
Thank you for all of your heart-felt words to me. I feel deeply that you understand "glorious sadness".
Peace and love
Gail

anne partain said...

Hi Gail, it is so good to let go and just be. No matter what that looks like. Sad, angry, afraid, happy, comforted. When we allow ourselves to be, we open to the comfort that comes from no longer suppressing ourselves.
Thank you for sharing. :)
Anne

Gail said...

Hi ANne-

"Exactly". Nicely stated. Alwyas so nice to see you.
Love and peace
Gail

The-Grizzled-But-Still-Incorrigible-Scribe-Himself! said...

Think of what this blog title—Glorious Sadness—implies:

Glorious—from "glory"…of magnificence and splendor, praise and worship, heavenly bliss

Sadness—from "sad"…of regret and sorrow, deep distress, disappointment, grief.

Quite the dichotomy. Emotions so widely opposite you'd at first think they share absolutely nothing. Wrong. They represent the spectrum—the full range. So? It says your life is balanced, that you live in the middle—neither wallowing in self-pity nor blinded by self-transcendent ecstasies. In other words, everything is working and you're in that middle-ground place of harmony and strength, logic and hope.

Gail said...

Hi Grizz-
WOw, your words are so powerful. I am nestled in between, that is for sure - fully aware of the magic of it all as I find peace in my own reality.

Love to you
Gail
peace......

giggles said...

Great song..... When I feel I need a good cry? This one'll do it!!
(I LOVE Scribe's insights!!!!)

Gail said...

Hi iggles-

So nice to see you - ya, this song gets me in my gut. And ya, the Grizz has amazing insight. Amen to that.
Love to you
Gail
peace.....

Comrade Kevin said...

Sometimes anguish is supremely cathartic.

Gail said...

Hi Kevin

You are 100% right on!! SO nice to see you here.

Love and peace
Gail