Sunday, March 6, 2011

The $250,000.00 envelope was mailed today.

Yes, worth close to a quarter of a million dollars.  I am sure you are all wondering, "what?" And so I will tell you.

Some years back, when my son started college I secured some of his tuition through a "parent's assist" program.  Even though he was granted large sums  in scholarships and grants each year fell short.  I, without hesitation, secured the rest for each year until he graduated, cum laude I might add from, NYU.   I paid faithfully every month until my health insisted I work part time and eventually my health was such that I took early retirement, and went on to Social Security Disability.  I knew I had to adjust my monthly payment and so I called my lender.  And we spoke and I told him of my 'situation' and that I needed to lower my payment.  He went on to say that I was in good standing and that he would be sendin gme a form to complete and have signed by my doctor.  He went on to say that once he received that completed form he would forward it on to the payment department and that my loan should be "forgiven".!!    I froze in space for a moment, and I said, "excuse me, did you say forgiven as in wiped clean"?  And he said, yes, exactly, "forgiven as in no longer owed"!!  We spoke further about the paperwork etc., and concluded our call.  I completed the form and my doctor signed it and my neurologist wrote a letter attesting to my permanent disability, as well.  It is all in the envelope and being mailed today.  Phew.  The reason I came up with almost a quarter million dollars as an amount is because with the interest over years and years that's close to how much I would have paid back on the original $60,000.00 owed, accumulated over the four years.  Of course, I will be unsure until I actually receive the 'notice of forgiveness' but who knew such a thing even existed?  Certainly not me.   Fingers and toes crossed  And wouldn't it be quite ironic if my having been diagnosed with MS also had a monetary value of almost a quarter of a million dollars. Now that is a real mind boggler-blower of monumental proportion.

I am beyond the worst of the tests and the more or less generic one is on hold for now.  One test was like being tazered, really - tazered over and over again for about forty minutes.  .  Never again.  I wasn't going to go at all but instead I pushed them up and got them over with.  And as far as these tests directing or changing treatment?  Didn't happen.  I have nerve damage, "duh", I freaking knew that already.  And balance?, I know it is off - again, "duh"!!  So I am through with those.  Thanks everyone for your prayers and love and concern and care. 

And so life goes on.  Irony, fair, unfair, surprises, challenges.  We feel good about doing the right thing, well right according to us - maybe someone else would see a greater or different 'right'.  I do think that two rights can coexist and it is hard to choose which right is more right in the moment.  And choosing one right over the other right doesn't negate the rightness of the one not chosen.  Wow, now there's amouthful, huh?  :-)  We have always been generous and shared our fortune of home and love and kindness, helping those in need albeit for food, shelter, safety, understanding, celebration, sorrow and on and on.  We do what we can when asked.  Now it is the right thing for us to take care of us as well, or first or.................

you see- Skipp lost his job on Friday.  As much as the hostile work environment he tolerated every day was a huge relief to be free of he was devastated that he was let go due to differences of managerial style.  Skipp being one who manages with respect, kindness, fairness, and team work and his owner _______________ And as much as we are SO happy to be together it is a scary time for us financially. And the BIG issue is health insurance.  We have much to sort out, cut back, redefine, adjust and accept.


We believe in 'us' and that we will get through this regardless of what changes we must make. We are scared and excited too as this is our time now - together - to set the stage for our life. We have people who love us and really care and that will lend support.  Our biggest asset is our love for one another and and our desire to always be greatful and count our blessings.  But this is our time, yes,  "Our time".......


 




 Love Gail, peace....... 









25 comments:

Bonnie said...

With everything on your plate right now, to have this loan 'forgiven' would be a great thing for you Gail. I hope it works out that way.

The stress so many Americans endure because of lack of health insurance, surely has to contribute to rising health problems ... seems almost like part of the diabolical plan of the greedy insurance companies.

We are so grateful to live in Canada, where although our health system is struggling, we do not have to consider ANY cost if we need to see a doctor, go to the emergency room, or have an operation. I'm sure this lack of stress contributes to our overall well-being.

So sorry too about your husband's job. Perhaps this will turn into an opportunity for him to create his own job/business.

Fingers crossed for you on all fronts!

P.S. Our university fees are also subsidized by our 'socialist'/humanist/caring government as is the case in most other western democracies.

Shen said...

Life is just like this post... there are suprises and things that seem unbelievably good and then there are the tragedies that keep trying to pull us down under with their watery currents. You have much to be thankful for as well as much to be annoyed and frustrated over.

I'm glad if the loans are forgiven. I'm sorry about the job loss. I'm glad your tests are nearly over - especially if the health insurance might be a problem soon.

Somehow things work out... and it's not always pretty and it's usually messy, but somehow it just does.

peace

Finding Pam said...

Gail, I am keeping you both in my prayers. God will provide. How wonderful for you to have time with Skip.

I pray that your loan will be forgiven. If anyone deserves it you do.

Stay positive and hopeful.

Lots of love and hugs to you.

Gail said...

BONNIE-

Oh my, thank you for your support. And ya, Canadians are fortunate when it comes to health care woes - we are taking it one moment at a time.

Love Gail
peace.....

SHEN- and thank you for all your intuitions and kind concern. I love how you always "get it". And I so enjoyed that writing exercise at your blog.

Love Gail
peace.....

Gail said...

PAM-
So nice of you too to show such care and love. It means a lot.
Love Gail
peace.....

Bernie said...

Oh Gail I am so sorry to learn of Skipp's job but hopefully something else will show up for him. Health care is so important especially as we age....am so pleased that we are well taken care of in Canada as far as that goes. When my son passed away, his students loans were also forgiven. It truly helped financially. Will keep you and your family in my prayers always and I just know everything will work out perfectly for you, such a wonderful family deserves nothing but the best our world has to offer.....:-)Hugs

Gail said...

BERNIE_

I always feel so good when you come by. I truly appreciate you sharing about your son that passed away. I am so sorry about that Bernie. :-)
Thank you for al your kind and understanding and loving words - and for all the hugs.
Love to you always my friend
Gail
peace.....

Cinner said...

Gail, I am so sorry to hear about Skipp losing his job. Maybe this will be a door to something new. Obviously DUH, Lol...I can understand the worry you both must be going through,...I know you will find strength now together. I hope that envelope has good news for you. that would be so wonderful especially at a time like this. I know you get so tired of those tests, and after all you don't know anything more than you did before. I know this. my friend you are a fighter, it will take more than this to get you down. I will be praying for you both. call if you need to ....collect. Love ya c

Diana said...

It seems as though we are constantly changing and evolving in this life. Accepting that and being able to flow with those changes is key to surviving them.
Knowing what I do about you and Skipp, I am sure that this is just the beginning of a new life for the two of you.
However much of a struggle these times are, I can't help but think about what are families before us had to endure as well. It's what keeps me going. I sometimes think that they would laugh at us!
I wish you and Skipp well Gail and will keep you in my prayers.
Love Di ♥

Lola said...

I'm sure you'll go through this Gail.

I'm sorry to hear you've been through tough challenges... I really hope you can feel some positive energy I'm sending you from here.
It's not enough but I'm doing my best
;)
Love & Warmest Hugs

Gail said...

HI DIANA-
Thank you so much for your shared wisdom and loving support. SKipp and I are like two school kids on summer vacation. We are a bit scared about some of the financial and insurance worries but we will find our way.
Love to you
Gail
peace.....

Gail said...

HI CINNER-

I know you understand so deeply all that I am feeling. You are so insightful and so loving. SKipp and I will be fine. AND I love love love the beautiful hand-made card you sent me. Timing is perfect. "Thank you" "hey"
Love to you
Gail
peace.....

Gail said...

LOLA
Thank you so much for your hugs and love and support. I feel your good energy from Italy
Love to you
Gail
peace....

Eileen said...

I was here earlier but I kept getting booted off.

Anyway, I'm so glad you and Skipp have each other to support each other through all the 'bad' and to celebrate with each other during the 'good'.
I was so happy to read about the loan being forgiven, but sorry to read about Skipp's job loss.
I think Ray could commiserate with Skipp, he and his managers lock horns a lot.
When he managed he fought 'tooth and nail' for his workers, and he treated them the way he would want to be treated. And he treated them as adults, trusting that they knew their jobs and would do them in a timely, successful manner (and they did!).
The company asked him to go back to programming because they felt they needed him that field more than in management, and things went downhill for the workers after that. He still tries to fight for his fellow workers, but most times it just falls on deaf ears.
Everyone says it used to be such a happy place to work, but not anymore.

I guess in these hard economic times management style can get away with a lot.
Skipp's a good man. I will keep you both in my prayers.
Love to you,
Eileen

Gail said...

EILEEN-

I so love how you understand my life. It seems also that we have much in common, :-) Your kindness and loving support mean so much to me. "thank you"
Love Gail
peace.....

Andy said...

So, there is something good (maybe) after all! I do hope the loan gets written off.

So sorry to hear about the other stuff. Not fantastic I know. On the bright side, you will spend more time with Skipp! Hurrah!

On the minus side, we (Europeans) fail to understand this idea that, having been hard-working, upright citizens of your country, your country fails to support you in times of sickness/unemployment and that you should be the least bit 'concerned' about health insurance. But it's a discussion for another time, I guess. It just makes me feel sad, that's all.

Gail said...

HI ANDY-

SO good to see you. And ya, we are SO happy to be together - we feel like school kids-best friends on vacation and an adventure. :-) And itis awful that we must worry about health insurance. It is a huge issue. Much to our delight SKipp's employer came thru with a severance package which includes the company paying BOTH of our health insurance premiums for three months. We are quite relieved and grateful. Also, he will receive the most allowed for unemployment. SO we cn relax for a couple of months and cherish our days together.
Love to you
Gail
peace......

Just Be Real said...

Lifting you all up in prayer Gail. Stress is not an easy thing. Blessings.

Gail said...

HI JBR

Thank you so much. WE are good all things considered and blessed in many ways.
Love to you
Gail
peace...

Wanda..... said...

Hoping for the best in all the situations, Gail. One never knows what's around the corner, but above all you have each other. I have a good friend that lives in Kauai and her daughter and infant grandchild live in Tokyo...there is concern for their well-being today with the earthquake in Japan. Take care and I'm sorry to have missed this when first posted.

Gail said...

HI WANDA-

You never need apologize for time being a mystery. I am honored you come by to visit me especially given all that is on your plate. Skipp and I are strong together and we will take on the challenge. And we to are worried abou the tsunami and earthquake in Japan - Skipp's son is in the military and stationed in Japan. Prayers for all.
Love to you
Gail
peace.....

Theanne and Baron said...

Prayers Gail for you and Skipp and for a positive reply to the $250,000 question!

Gail said...

Hi Theanne and Baron - so nice of you to come by. I really appreciate your prayers and well wishes. We are ok - yup - we are. :-)'
Love to you
Gail
peace.....

Tramp said...

Hi Gail
Your comment at Riverdaze really reached me, "beautiful bright darkness". That should be nonsense, but as one British comedian once said, "When logic fails us, sometimes nonsense can help".
...Tramp

Gail said...

HI TRAMP- thanks so much for seeing beyond the words and feeling the intent - :-) love to you always
Gail
peace.....