Happy Birthday Dolan

"DOLAN PAUL - born march 21st.

Dolan was named after my grandmother on my Dad's side - her maiden name was Dolan. His middle name was given him in memory of his father's twin brother that was killed 27 years ago. Dolan's father and I went to Washington state to be with his twins fiance following his tragic death. We drove along the Pacific Coast Highway to San Francisco. Once there she had rented a special plane. We took Paul's ashes up in the plane with us to Bridal Veil Mountain in Yosemite National Park where they were to be married. We went on the day - June 12th. Later that night, Dolan was created out of love, passion and grief. I felt the moment and it was glorious. Dolan, at birth, was nine pounds, nine ounces!! And ironically he was a twin - his twin did not develop properly and did not make it. :-( There was so much Dolan though, so much. :-)
And so for a time we loved Dolan together and then, as life happened, his Dad left and we forged on together with courage and faith.

Dolan is a wonderful young man - with intelligent wit, a loving heart, compassion, wisdom, passion for life, a good friend and so 'just' - he is a gifted, published writer, a unique artist/illustrator, a talented musician, a comic, a playwright, a teacher, and simple gentle man who cares deeply about so much and so many. I think three things are critical to such wonderful qualities, first is that he always had a fan-cheerleader, ME!, second I always encouraged and supported his personal creative expressions, always, and thirdly I always told him that when his Dad and I created him we loved each other very much and that for a time we loved him together until we no longer could and then I took over.

I have learned so much from Dolan - in many ways he has taught me so much. And I love that he turns to me for guidance and answers on his life challenges. We honor one another and it feels so good. I will end this with one story about Dolan's wisdom ad keen intuition:

A few years back, after an ice storm SKipp and I and some friends braved the icy roads and headed to a local pub/restaurant for some drinks and food - there were over 100 people in the restaurant and bar - I suppose all of like thinking - we all had cabin fever from the ice storm!!!! It was very noisy in the bar and the restaurant side was very full as well. We were laughing and having fun and told some 'off-color' jokes, which apparently was heard by a family in the restaurant- which, for the life of me, given the amount of people, and noise I could not understand how anyone could distinguish who said what - be that as it may our waitress rudely told us our conversation was offensive and to keep it down - One of our friends told her that she was very rude and we left soon after.

Over the years of loyal patronage Skipp and I had developed a close relationship with the restaurant owner - Bruce. And, Bruce was the MC during the Special Olympics event on our town green which featured the song Skipp wrote about our special needs grandson. Our experience of planning this event with Brice drew us very close. That being said we felt we could write to Bruce about our experience at his restaurant - so we did. Several days later we received a certified letter from him. We truly believed it must be a gift certificate given the recent events. HAH!! The letter was a formal notice advising us we were "not allowed in his restaurant ever again and if we did show up we would be arrested for criminal trespass.!!" We were shocked. Can you even imagine?

A few years after while Dolan was home on school break he said he wanted to eat at this particular restaurant. I was concerned given the "no trespass" letter. He felt it would be fine. I nervously went with him. I hoped Bruce wouldn't be there but he was. I said to Dolan "What do I say if he comes up to me" Dolan said, "Just say, "Bruce, I trust that time has reconciled us". And so it came to pass, Bruce happened by, and he stopped at our table - and I said "Bruce, I trust that time has reconciled us". and he answered, "Yes, yes it has, enjoy your meal." :-) Dolan was right. 100%!!! Good story, huh?
:-)

So, happy birthday Son - you are such a gift - a blessing - and your very existence transcends all that is unjust in this world. I love you.............. Mom